Yugi and Seto Play:
by Lily Bookmarks
Summary: Inspired and scripted by the Two Best Friends Play series on Youtube. Two years after the events of the canon series, Yugi and Seto are still playing games. Video games, that is. More information inside.
1. Chapter 1

**(A/N: Moien! Inspired by _Two Best Friends Play_, I bring to you its' crossover with Yu-Gi-Oh!**

**These shots of sorts take place two years after the canon universe. For reasons I can't summarize without sounding ridiculous, Yugi is playing Matt and Kaiba is playing Pat. Yugi is still a bit tender about Yami leaving, and Kaiba exploits this once in a while. Sticking with the _Two Best Friends Play _script, so it contains massive OOC content and weirdness. Presented to you in a script form. If it makes more sense, it could be Abridged!Yugi and Abridged!Kaiba.**

**Puzzleshipping included for your amusement. This fic was written with my entertainment in mind, so don't feel obligated to read it if you don't like it.**

**Needless to say, this is a crackfic. Be prepared for anything. There's also a lot of censored swearing and/or omissions and/or replacing of words.)**

CHAPTER 1: SKYRIM

Seto: You ready to play some Skyrim?

Yugi: Not really.

Seto: Come on, man! It's like a million hours long!

Yugi: I've never heard of this game.

Seto: It's the hypest game that's currently existing!

Yugi: Well they should've advertised it.

{CUT}

Yugi: Dragons are for nerds. Like Dragonlance.

Seto: You know what else- {Laughs} You were going to say ****'s for nerds and then you bring up Dragonlance?! You flipping nerd!

{CUT}

Guy on screen: You were trying to cross the border right?

Yugi: I sure was, Squizgar.

{CUT}

Seto: We got Orcs...

Yugi (Sarcastically): They sure look good.

Seto :Yeah, they look good.

{CUT}

Yugi: Why are all these elves ugly as shiz?

Seto: Because elves are ******.

Yugi: Elves are supposed to look like Tyrande Whisperwind.

Seto: ...WHAT?!

{CUT}

Both: WHAT?!

Yugi: Oh, Thundercats Ho! Just turn this game off!

Seto: Okay, I've got a solution. {Selects Argonian} Pick this flipping dude.

Yugi: Why?

Seto: Because he's a lizard dude.

Yugi: So what are you going to name him?

Seto: What do you think I'm going to name him?!

{CUT}

Seto: ...You know what? You know what's better than being invisible?

Yugi: What?

Seto: Being invisiblessed.

Yugi: Why?

Seto: BECAUSE YOU'RE SO INVISIBLE!

{CUT}

Yugi: (Imitating Imperial Guards) Couldn't he be the prince of a foreign land? I hope so, kill him anyway! This will look good on my resume when I go apply for Imperial ******* College.

[SFX: Seto laughing]

{CUT}

Yugi(Looking at an ice pick) So this is what dentists used in the land of Elder scrolls.

Seto: Yeah, those cavities are a *****, they're inhabited by the Daedra.

{CUT}

Seto: Alright, I'm gonna sneak up on this dude. I'm gonna shoot him because I'm _invisible._

(Misses)

Seto: Okay, well, Maybe I'll shoot him this time.

(Hits)

Both: YEAH!

{CUT}

Seto: _Sneakin' with my silent little lizard feet..._

{CUT}

Yugi: The majestic Egyptian Yami, beautiful in his simplicity. He is a wonderful predator, that-

Seto: THAT'S NOT WHAT IT SAYS!

{CUT}

Seto: Hey, check this out. (Kills chicken) **** you chicken!

Yugi: What?

Seto: No, get it. (Uses zombie spell) Now the chicken is my thrall! It's a zombie chicken! (Kills chicken again) And it's dead!

{CUT}

[SFX: Seto laughing]

Seto: COME AT ME BRO!

{CUT}

Guy on screen: Are you ready to join your spirit with the beast world?

Seto: Can I be a lizard beast man?

Yugi: It's my animality.

(Guy pulls out sword)

Both: Woah!

Seto: Okay, what is the process of this?

(Guy cuts werewolf's arm, and poor animation fills the altar.)

[SFX: Yugi and Seto's laughter]

{CUT}

(Poor animation transition from werewolf to Argonian)

[SFX: Yugi and Seto's laughter]

Seto: Yeah, that's how werewolves change back!

{CUT}

Seto: Dude, thanks!

(Giant kills him)

Yugi: I saw that coming!

{CUT}

[Both are shocked by Grelod]

Seto: WHAT?!

Yugi: This is like a look into your childhood.

Seto: This is horrible. She's making the kids recite Facist pledges. She's going DOWN!

{CUT}

(Kids are celebrating Yugi and Seto)

Seto: WHAT THE *******?!

Yugi: CELEBRATE ME!

Seto: This is the creepiest ******!

**(And this concludes my first shot. Sorry about that low jab at Kaiba's childhood, but I just couldn't pass that up. **

**NEXT GAME: PORTAL 2)**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Moien! In this episode, Yugi and Seto play Portal 2, and Seto gets his verbal revenge for that low jab at his childhood. It's Yugi's turn to be OOC.)**

_**Yugi and Seto, they're best friends who play together,**_

_**And learn about sharing and junk.**_

_**Best friends play together!**_

CHAPTER 2: PORTAL 2

Seto: (Sounds exasperated) Okay, let's do this.

Yugi: This is gonna be fun, right?

Seto: Yeah, the game is fun but...You're an idiot.

{CUT}

(Portal opens)

Seto: Look, portal. There you go.

Yugi: Aah, what the ******! Who's that?

Seto: Do you not understand the concept of portals?

Yugi: What the ******?

Seto: This is like the whole game! This is the whole thing right here!

Yugi: This is like looking at one of those infinite mirror elevators.

Seto: Yes it is, but you can walk through it!

Yugi: But I don't like that! When I'm in those elevators I start freaking out!

Seto: You really start freaking out in those elevators?

Yugi: ...Yeah.

{CUT}

Yugi: Where is this coming from? Are there three portals or four?

Seto: There's two.

Yugi: What? Look, there's one... two... three.

Seto: You're looking at a portal through another portal, just from a different direction.

Yugi: What? Hang on. (Sticks only his head through the portal on the ceiling)

Seto: WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!

Yugi: I don't get it.

{CUT}

Yugi: What does this thing do?

Seto: That's a material Emancipation Grid.

Yugi: What? I don't listen to rap.

{CUT}

Announcer: Relax, lie on your back, and apply immediate pressure to your temples.

Yugi: Okay.

Announcer: You are simply experiencing a rare reaction, in which the material Emancipation Grill may have emancipated the ear tubes inside your head.

Yugi: My ear tubes?!

Seto: You don't need those.

Yugi: They're my favorite tubes.

Seto: No they're not!

{CUT}

Seto: This is not hard!

Yugi: No one told me anything...

Seto: No one tells you anything! To my knowledge, I'm the only person who talks to you anymore! Ever since Yami left, you're like the Ralph Wiggum of real life. I turn around for two seconds and catch you eating glue and crayons.

Yugi: (Eating an unwrapped crayon like pocky with a guilty look on his face) This is getting a little too personal.

{CUT}

Yugi: When do I get my shotgun? This is getting a little ridiculous, it's been like... 5 minutes.

Seto: You'll get your shotgun when Episode 3 comes out.

Yugi: That was my least favorite Star Wars, I'll tell you that.

Seto: What the ***** are you... Oh, ****** you.

{CUT}

Wheatley: Hey! You made it!

Yugi: Hey, it's Yami!

Seto: His name isn't Yami. They're not all named Yami, that's horrible.

{CUT}

(Yugi falls into a trapdoor)

Yugi: *****! Oh, no no no!

Seto: See? See? Progression.

Wheately: Do you see the portal gun?

Yugi: No.

Wheatley: Also, are you alive?

Yugi: Yes!

Seto: Why are you physically responding to a character in a videogame?

Yugi: Because...

Seto: The TV can't hear you! (Repeats as Yugi is talking)

Yugi: Look, there's no shotgun so far, so I have to find some way to make it entertaining!

{CUT}

Announcer: Smooth jazz will be deployed.

Yugi: Smooth jazz?

Seto: You ready for some smooth jazz?

(Jazz starts playing)

Yugi: Aww ******!

Seto: IT'S SO SMOOTH I CAN'T TAKE IT!

Yugi: I'm slipping all over the place!

Seto: I'M JUST SLIDING OUT OF THIS CHAIR!

(Music shorts out.)

Seto: Well, that's depressing.

{CUT}

Yugi: Hey, there's a Joey.

Seto: Yes there- Joey? Now you just have to get THAT cube. Can YOU figure out a way?

{CUT}

Seto: Holy *******, good job. I think I have some dog treats I can give you.

Yugi: Well good-HEY!

{CUT}

Yugi: Hey, look it's Yami again!

Seto: HIS NAME IS NOT YAMI! Did you just flipping throw the portal behind flipping Yami- (Exasperated sigh) NOW YOU'RE SAYING THAT SHIZ AND- ****** YOU! YOU ARE LIKE BRAIN CANCER! MIND CANCER! YOU'RE NOT A BRAIN TUMOR... YOU'RE RUINING MY IDEAS!

{CUT}

Yugi: Okay, so where are we now?

Seto: You have to find an escape route. But don't worry. It's flipping harmless.

Yugi: He's saying that bad things are going to happen.

Seto: Yeah, but he's a little ******. Don't worry about him.

Yugi: So nothing bad will happen?

Seto: Nothing bad will happen.

{CUT}

GLaDOS: Oh, it's YOU. (Throws Wheately into an incinerator)

Both: NO!

Yugi: You said nothing bad would happen!

Seto: TO YOU!

Yugi: YAMI!

{CUT}

Yugi: Hey, I'm a robot.

Seto: I am also a robot.

Yugi: I'm a better robot than you.

Seto: You don't even know which robot you are yet.

Yuigi: I'm probably the one that's the best one.

Seto: Which one is that?

Yugi: It's the one with blue in it... That one! You're the orange one!

Seto: Cool. I get to be the tall robot.

Yugi: ...Aww *****.

{CUT}

Yugi: What's the most American animal here?

Seto: The chicken.

Yugi: No way! I'm like Three Wolf Moon here!

{CUT}

Seto: Hey, wait! I've got something cool to show you.

Yugi: Yeah, right. You fooled me before...

Seto: Look down, and shoot a portal at your feet.

Yugi: I'm gonna say no to this.

Seto: Just do it.

Yugi: Okay...

Seto: Just do it you wimp.

(Shoots portal)

Seto: Yeah. Traveling through space-time!

Yugi: Yeah, I stopped your little trap. (Falls back in) *****!

{CUT}

Seto: Step on that button. (Door closes on him) Why would you do that?

Yugi: Oh, sorry.

Seto: JUST FLIPING STEP ON THE BUTTON! (Door closes on him again) WHY WOULD YOU FLIPPING DO THAT?!

{CUT}

Seto: I swear to god, If I walk over there, and that door closes on me, I'm going to go outside, find a homeless guy, pay him money, to come here, and take a dump in your sink.

Yugi: … (Gets off button)

Seto: WHAT THE-

{CUT}

Seto: Here, take the stupid cube. I don't want it anyway.

Yugi: SLAM DUNK! (Glass breaks)

Seto: NO! You have to use it to solve the shiz!

Yugi: YEAH!

Seto: STOP IT! FLIPPING... AMERICA! WHY WOULD YOU DO THA- AAAH! (Cube knocks Seto backwards into water. Yugi laughs hysterically)

{CUT}

Seto: Are you even jumping? What are you doing?

(Camera zooms out to show Yugi in a two ground portal trap.)

Seto: Stop it. We need to solve these flipping puzzles.

Yugi: I can't... solve these puzzles! There are too many sciences!

{CUT}

(Now Seto is caught in a gravity trap)

Yugi: This is like an abstract painting of our stupidity.

Seto: Mostly yours, though. Mostly yours.

Yugi: I think it's around 50-50, because you're in the same problem I am!

Seto: I hate your face.

Yugi: We need to play something that won't stress us out because this is madness right now and nothing's being solved. So what can we play?

{CUT}

Seto: Oh yeah! Why didn't we play this before?!

Yugi: EVERYTHING IS FUN!

**(A/N: And that concludes my second shot. As revenge for the jab at Kaiba's childhood, I made him verbally fish-slap Yugi repeatedly. **


	3. Chapter 3

**(A/N: Moien! As if last chapter wasn't enough, this chapter has ANOTHER Yugi beatdown on Seto's part. Don't worry, I'll make sure everyone breaks even by the last part.**

_**Yugi and Seto, They're best friends who play together,**_

_**And learn about sharing and junk.**_

_**One is nice, and the other, not so nice,**_

_**Oh, who couldn't love Yugi and Seto?**_

**_Best friends play together!_)**

CHAPTER 3: ASSASSIN'S CREED BROTHERHOOD

(Seto dies)

Seto: Aww *******!

Yugi: Yeah, you're a real combat specialist.

(The following comment has been omitted for being over the line)

{CUT}

Seto: It was a furious battle! There was thunder and lightning, it lasted for days!

Yugi: (Various sounds of disbelief)

{CUT}

Seto: There is an awesome achievement you can get by jumping off that giant pole.

Yugi: I love achievements!

Seto: First you've got to climb that flipping thing, that fortress.

Yugi: Alright. Is this a good way to go?

Seto: Yeah, this is fine.

{CUT}

Yugi: How many achievement points is this worth?

Seto: I think it's like, 50.

Yugi: Alright, let's do this!

Seto: I can't believe you're such a flipping achievement *******.

Yugi: Whatever...

{CUT}

Seto: Alright, you see that huge wall? You've got to go all the way around, and then come back and climb all the way to the top.

Yugi: Okay...

{CUT}

Seto: You're never going to do it.

Yugi: (Frustrated noises, messes up jump)

Seto: Oh, great job.

Yugi: I'm okay!

Seto: You're stupid.

Yugi: See? I'm climbing on stuff.

{CUT}

Seto: You are the worst sneaky ninja.

Yugi: No one knows I'm here! I'm Mister Incognito.

Seto: You don't even know what incognito means!

Yugi: It means that no one can see me with our eyeballs. (Points to eye that's dilating rapidly)

{CUT}

Seto: Okay, see this? You're gonna have to go all the way over to the left side... and then all the way across... the top... Do you see where I'm pointing you? (Pointing with inexplicable banana)

Yugi: Yeah.

Seto: And then climb onto that thing up there. You're almost there. It's taken, like, a whole flipping day to get up here, but we're almost there.

{CUT}

Yugi: So do I have to climb up this giant spire thing?

Seto: Yep, you're almost there. I didn't think you had it in you.

Yugi: (Smiles)

Seto: What, with you being an incompetent sack of shiz.

Yugi: Well, you know what? Thanks. At least you're helping me get this achievement.

Seto: Yeah, I don't remember what it's called, though.

{CUT}

Seto: You don't have to aim anywhere, you just have to hit the ground without dying.

Yugi: I use the parachute, right?

Seto: Yeah, you use the parachute. So you jump off the spire and hit X, and just when you start to lose momentum, you hit B really hard, in order to just gun it.

Yugi: Okay.

Seto: Well, do it.

Yugi: Okay, here we GO! (Jumps off spire and hits X)

Seto: You're totally doing it!

Yugi: I'm just focusing on the ground right now.

Seto: You're kind of losing it. Hit B! Hit B!

(Yugi plummets to his death)

Yugi: WHOA! WHAT THE-

Seto: (Laughing) You're so flipping gullible!

Yugi: Why?!

[SFX: Seto's mad laughter]

Seto: Oh, you stupid idiot!

**(A/N: And that concludes my third episode. I swear on my word as a good writer that I will have Yugi one-up Seto in the next part.**

**NEXT GAME: RESIDENT EVIL 4)**


	4. Chapter 35

**(A/N: Excuse me while I rant a bit here.**

**I would like to remind everyone that these scripts were written for MY amusement, so you don't have to read it if you don't like it. **

**So no, Nopinator and Eyes, I will NOT stop writing these scripts, because they're for MY entertainment alone. You were not FORCED here and FORCED to read my scripts, however stupid they may be. And to Nopinator: If you really would choose to watch Two Best Sisters Play over this script, why didn't you? I do appreciate your fake sincerity, though. I read stuff all the time I don't like. I just navigate away from the story. Why can't you do that instead of leaving deconstructive messages under the cover of anonymous viewer? Of all things, that makes you two cowards. So get over it.**

***Pant Pant * Sorry about that. I just needed to get it out of my system. I really hate writing stuff like this, but these haters make me do it.**

**Anyway, let's get to the main attraction!)**


	5. Chapter 4

**(A/N: Moien! Let's break even here and have Yugi one-up Seto! I've also started to use emoticons occasionally. **

_**RESIDENT EVIL! 4!)**_

Seto: Wait, what do you mean you didn't like Resident Evil 4?

Yugi: It was kinda hard, and I didn't really get-

Seto: Just shut up and enjoy the best game ever made.

{CUT}

Seto: There's a crow, like an evil mockingbird...

Yugi: Shiz. Are they zombies?

Seto: No. There aren't any zombies in this game.

Yugi: What? It's Resident Evil.

Seto: There are no zombies in Resident Evil 4.

Yugi: So what are these guys called?

Seto: I don't know, but I bet one of them is called Miguel, and another is called Sanchez.

{CUT}

Yugi: Why can't I run and walk and shoot?

Seto: I'm gonna-I'm gonna punch your face. .

Yugi: Games should be a lot better-

Seto: I'm gonna kill you.

{CUT}

Yugi: Oh shiz, elderly people.

Seto: Talk to him with your gun! Say hello! (Shots fired) See? NOT a zombie.

Yugi: That's a typo.

Seto: OF WHAT?! CROMBIE?! JOMBIE?! ZIMBIE?! ZAMBAMBO?!

{CUT}

Yugi: Hey! Treasure! (Room is filled with rotting corpses)

Seto: That's not treasure.

Yugi: Looks like they've killed a lot of people...

Seto: I can read, *********.

{CUT}

Seto: Hey, go over to that window, and press A.

Yugi: That will probably just kill me, so-

Seto: JUST DO IT OR I SWEAR TO GOD I WILL HURT YOU!

(Glass breaks)

Seto: Kablam!

{CUT}

Yugi: So where's all the evil? I haven't seen it yet.

Seto: Really? The people trying to kill you and say creepy Spanish shiz isn't evil?

Yugi: I don't see anything evil at all in this- Oh.

Seto: See?

{CUT}

Seto: Hey, it's that dog.

Yugi: What dog?

Seto: That dog. You should save that dog.

Yugi: I saved him! No wait, come back! (Dog runs away) ...Yami...

Seto: You don't need him. You get to be alone all the time now.

Yugi: Just like you.

Seto: Would you shut- Yeah, it's true.

{CUT}

Yugi: Okay, what's in here- OH WHAT THE **- (Yugi dies)

{CUT}

Yugi: Uh...

Seto: I don't think you're good at sneaking...

Yugi: Oh, hey money! I'm in your house, stealing your moneys!

Seto: Oh shiz! (Yugi shoots the zombie)

{CUT}

Yugi: What's that?

Seto: That's a chainsaw!

Yugi: OH SHIZ! (Gets attacked by chainsaw)

{CUT}

(Let me explain something here, because this part had to be omitted for crossing the language barrier horribly. Yugi was running from a boulder, and failed. Seto got mad at him and started a very foul mouthed argument. If I hadn't omitted this part, it would have just been a string of asteriks (*), with the ocassional 'you'. I hope you understand.)

Seto:...Okay, since you're such a stupid whiny baby, I'll do it.

Yugi: Yeah, I'm SO sure you'll do it.

{CUT}

Seto: This is all you have to do. Look, I'm not even looking!

Yugi: You might want to look now. (Seto gets killed by boulder)

Seto: What the heck?!

Yugi: That's how I thought it would go down.

Seto: ...Go eat a boat... .

{CUT}

Seto: How does the 3D effect work for you?

Yugi: It's great. I don't like where they put the stylus on the 3DS-OH SHIZ!

{CUT}

Yugi: This mission hasn't been going well.

Seto: Yeah, it could be going better.

{CUT}

Yugi: Who the heck is that?

Seto: Oh, you don't know him? He's your friend.

Yugi: That creepy guy is my friend?

Seto: Yeah, he looks like a creepy guy, but he's your friend.

{CUT} (Shot rings out)

Seto: WHY DID YOU DO THAT?!

Yugi: It just happened when I returned to the screen!

Seto: He's not going to sell you shiz anymore?!

{CUT}

Seto: ...He was your only friend in this horrible wasteland and you murdered him.

Yugi: IT WAS AN ACCIDENT! D:

{CUT}

Yugi: Wait, what?! (Sees guy he shot by accident)

Seto: What the shiz?!

Yugi: I KILLED HIM!

{CUT}

Seto: Go to the end of the pier, and there's a bunch of fish that you can kill, and you'll get items from them.

Yugi: Really?

Seto: Yeah, I think one of them drops a ruby or something.

Yugi: You got some from the crows right? You can do that with fish too?

Seto: Yeah, you can do it with all the wildlife.

{CUT}

(Shots fired)

Yugi: Where are they?

Seto: Just get a few more.

(Giant fish eats Yugi)

Seto: (Laughing a little) You didn't shoot the fishy...

**(A/N: And that concludes the fourth shot. I've gotten some bad criticism about the format of this story, so anyone who was just about to write an angry review telling me to stop this story, please refer to Chapter 3.5.**

**NEXT GAME: POKEMON SNAP)**


End file.
